Monday, 21 September 2015

When Kindness Backfires

 Hello there acorns,

This is a somewhat cautionary tale of how aiming to please everyone can backfire. Something I have only recently learnt and will certainly be wary of in the future.
Smiling, complimenting, inspiring and trying your best to be helpful. That warm, alleviating feeling that overwhelms your heart when seeing someone's face lighten after intending to support them; you can't beat it. But what if that feeling is absent?
Despite what battles may be going on in each of our lives, we continue to put our efforts into making others happy, because we wouldn't want anyone to suffer the way we have done therefore do our best to prevent it.
But as I've now found, this approach isn't necessarily always beneficial. As I'm sure we've all done this; giving hypocritical advice to friends/ family whilst ignoring it ourselves. As it turns out, some can take your intentions the completely wrong way and perceive you as a selfish individual who wastes their own life by putting up a wall and being false.
Admittedly, at first this perspective really quite angered me. How could being kind mean I'm a terrible person? But while I still slightly disagree, I do see their point of view.
There is no reason to ignore our own advice just because we don't care enough. Although it's undoubtedly great to be so passionate about the happiness of others, it is our own lives which must come first.
We each have a story to journey through, taking every day to write a new page, however and wherever we want. In order to give the best advice and solicitude, we must stand as an example of what we believe in. Of what we believe to be righteous and above all, positive.
People won't benefit from our advice if they look at us and see that we do not care for ourselves. So it's time to put your soul into your own heart and step out into that unrelenting world, be brave, be passionate and live the life you desire.
Yes, it's easier said than done, but as an individual you deserve to be happy. So make sure you are, and then spread that warmth to those surrounding you.

Take care,

B x